If you’re perfectly happy with your body, thank you very much, and if you’ve never struggled with the issue of body image or self acceptance – well, you probably won’t be particularly interested in reading any further.
But if you’ve ever obsessed about your weight, or felt dissatisfied with your looks, or wished you could change something about your body – and I suspect, sadly, that many of you can relate to this – then you just might appreciate these musings.
I’m guessing that you’ve probably heard of the Serenity Prayer – you know,
While the Serenity Prayer has often been used by and incorporated into various twelve-step programs, I believe it can also be effective in working through body image and self acceptance issues.
Though I have a long way to go in my journey, I’d like to share with you some of my insights as I’ve been meditating on the Serenity Prayer and applying it to my own struggles in this area.
Serenity to Accept
Barring extreme surgery or the unlikely invention of a time machine, I must recognize that there are certain facts about my body, my choices, my history – all of which contribute to my body image as it stands today – that simply cannot be changed or undone.
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
- my body type and overall weight distribution
- my bone structure and frame
- my height
- the size of my feet
- the shape of my hands
- the shape of my fingernails
- the texture and thickness of my hair
- the manner and culture in which I was raised
- the attitudes I learned
- the time I have wasted
- the mistakes I have made
- my failures
- others’ opinions of me or my behaviour
My acceptance of these facts as unchangeable relinquishes me from their power to distract my efforts and energy away from the things over which I do have control.
Courage to Change
I recognize and celebrate the fact that there are a great many areas of my life that are well within my power to change… and drawing on my courage and inner strength to do so will help guide me towards redefining my body image into a healthy, positive vision of self acceptance.
Courage to change the things I can
- I can learn positive ways of thinking and translate them into positive behaviours.
- I can cultivate new beliefs and attitudes about life, myself, my body, my choices.
- I can learn from my upbringing and culture by keeping the good and discarding the unhelpful.
- I can choose when and what I eat.
- I can become active and fit.
- I can reach and maintain a healthy weight.
- I can choose to take care of myself by visiting the doctor and dentist regularly, getting enough sleep, staying hydrated.
- I can choose to make the most of what I have by paying attention to my outward appearance and accentuating the positive with flattering clothes, hair, makeup.
- I can make the most of every new day I’m given.
- I can proactively plan for the future.
- I can learn to forgive myself and move on when I stumble or fall.
- I can plan for success.
I am not a victim!
Wisdom to Know
And wisdom to know the difference
My experience has been that wisdom to know the difference comes by setting aside the time to meditate on these issues… by being willing to explore some uncomfortable and possibly painful feelings… by putting nebulous thoughts into tangible words.
And then it’s about making wise choices…
…the choice to take the list of unchangeables and set it aside – not to be forgotten, for it is part of who I am, but to be put in its place and not given another moment of wishful thinking or regret.
…the choice to be courageous and take control over the items on the list of things that can be changed.
…the choice to stop, and think, and be aware when something slips from one list to the other and, gently but firmly, put it back in its rightful place.
How does the “Serenity Prayer” help you with body image issues?
Please share!
(Originally posted in May, 2012.)
{ 21 comments… add one }
Very poignant … Something to ponder upon..
Twitter: alphabetsalad
January 13, 2014
Thank you.
Laurel Regan recently posted… Today’s Gratitude List – Linkup No. 12
I wonder if it is a sign because I have decided that 2014 is my year of acceptance. And all points mentioned are things I have to do
Richa Singh recently posted… She decided to take a walk-Part 11
Twitter: alphabetsalad
January 13, 2014
That makes sense to me!
Laurel Regan recently posted… Today’s Gratitude List – Linkup No. 12
Twitter: RochelleCoach
January 13, 2014
Hi Laurel,
I never thought of using the serenity prayer in the excellent way you describe it and are using it. I do subscribe greatly in my every moment — when I remember — to accept what is.
Thanks for a great article.
Rochelle Gordon recently posted… Be Out Of Your Mind
Twitter: alphabetsalad
January 13, 2014
Acceptance is so important. Not easy, but important. Thank you for your thoughts!
Laurel Regan recently posted… Today’s Gratitude List – Linkup No. 12
Twitter: ccassara
January 13, 2014
Yes, yes, yes!! one of the best things I’ve read this week. Thank you.
Carol Cassara recently posted… Meaningfulness: of friends and days
Twitter: alphabetsalad
January 13, 2014
Thank you so much, Carol!
Twitter: hjcameron
January 13, 2014
Really enjoy this. I love the way your phrased it. Bookmarked for future reading when I need a reminder. Thank you.
Heather Cameron recently posted… Monday Morning Moment: Begin Doing
Twitter: alphabetsalad
January 13, 2014
Thank you so much, Heather – glad you enjoyed it.
Laurel Regan recently posted… Today’s Gratitude List – Linkup No. 12
I have an embroidered replica of the serenity prayer that my mom made hanging in my house. They are words to live by! ♥
Twitter: alphabetsalad
January 13, 2014
They definitely are!
Laurel Regan recently posted… Today’s Gratitude List – Linkup No. 12
Wow…Thank you for sharing. This hit me right between the eyes and resonates with where I am. I have always wanted to look my best. I have a vanity streak. As I age it is harder cover up my aging body and keep up with the young and beautiful. My goal for 2014 is to make a paradigm shift in this area so I can be at peace with myself.
Twitter: alphabetsalad
January 13, 2014
Thank you for sharing, Mary – glad you appreciated my post. I have a very long way to go, but looking at things from this angle is helping.
Laurel Regan recently posted… Today’s Gratitude List – Linkup No. 12
Great post. This is the year my resolution of to focus on being Fit. That’s financially, physically and spiritually. If what I’m doing doesn’t fit into a fit pattern, then I can let it go. It has helped me focus on my daily to do lists and life goals. So good, so far.
Connie McLeod recently posted… A Spoonful of Sugar?
Twitter: alphabetsalad
January 13, 2014
Sounds like a great plan for the year… glad things are going well so far.
Laurel Regan recently posted… Today’s Gratitude List – Linkup No. 12
Twitter: mjmjuneau
January 13, 2014
You have won
http://melaniejeanjuneau.wordpress.com/2014/01/13/the-superstar-blogger-award-a-ripple-effect-of-blessings/
melanie jean juneau recently posted… You Might As Well Laugh…
Twitter: mjmjuneau
January 14, 2014
i did not get you up on my list because I did not know if you accepted awards- do you?
http://melaniejeanjuneau.wordpress.com/2014/01/13/the-superstar-blogger-award-a-ripple-effect-of-blessings/
melanie jean juneaum recently posted… My Thoughts Are Leaping For Joy.
Twitter: alphabetsalad
January 14, 2014
Thanks so much, Melanie – no worries! Sure, I accept awards if people choose to nominate me.
Laurel Regan recently posted… Today’s Gratitude List – Linkup No. 12
Twitter: inevertoldher
January 14, 2014
Laurel, that was a fantastic post. I wish my twenty something self was reading it.
I am sharing this post with everyone I care about.
Congrats on the Superstar blogger award as well.
Twitter: alphabetsalad
January 14, 2014
Thank you so much for your kind words, and congratulations to you as well!
Laurel Regan recently posted… Today’s Gratitude List – Linkup No. 12
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